I remember when I was younger, had no concept of the value of a dollar (I still don’t because one, I’m not American and two, the exchange rate is shocking), and did not appreciate the importance of things going on sale.
Now that I’m older and let’s be honest, not even a little bit wiser, getting something with even a tiny bit of money off is one of life’s greatest pleasures. There’s nothing better than someone saying they like what you’re wearing and getting to say with eyes wider than ASOS’ range of coats that you got it in the sale for HALF. PRICE. HALF PRICE! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? OHMYGODNOMENEITHERTHISISAMAZING.
Now that it’s January, retailers know that nothing beats the post-Christmas blues like buying a completely impractical outfit that you’ll never wear nor fit in because you overdid it a bit on pigs in blankets and mulled wine, purely because it’s 70% off. Except, it’s up to 70% off and you’re only actually saving £3.80.
So, these are the emotional stages of shopping the sales this January:
You walk into the shop, ready for action. You got this.
Except suddenly River Island has become the world’s girliest mosh pit.
You spot the love of your life. You always thought he’d be tall, dark and handsome, but in reality, it’s velvet and £18 instead of £60.
But then someone else grabs it before you can get to it and you start plotting.
Or it’s not in your size.
Or it’s white and there’s bright orange foundation all around the neck.
Like the end of every night out ever, you lower your standards and grab the first thing you see even though you know you don’t actually want it.
Maybe you’ll learn to love it?
If you maybe like, grow a foot, lose a stone and suddenly turn into Miranda Kerr.
So you leave, disgruntled, disappointed and swearing you won’t spend any more unnecessary money.
Except you know that’s never going to happen. For one very important reason.
Feature photo courtesy of Flickr user duncan c.
